Brave Enough To Be Bliss

Thinking back to the timeframe also, his trying new things may have made me uncomfortable because that’s something I didn’t do and didn’t want to do. It’s like overly dramatic responses to other people’s likes, dislikes, plans, preferences which I definitely had plenty of … I would never do that. I could never do that. I don’t understand how he could do that. Why would she ever want to do that? When these types of reactions arise, it’s wise to pause for a moment and really think about why there is such emotion behind the response. This blog might help you get started with that self-reflection.

Beginning to be brave... (gingerbliss.life)

I did learn from the situation with John and now when people share something new or different for them, I try to ask questions instead of saying something that might seem insensitive or unsupportive. Certainly, he could have said something at the time if I did hurt his feelings, but change is hard, so asking questions is generally a better communication method than making statements especially when we ’ re confused about something. Making comments and assumptions in situations we don’t fully understand can hurt those we love and prevent them from becoming the 2.0 versions of themselves they could be. “Once you start seeing the results of self -improvement it really becomes addicting. You start falling in love with the person you’re becoming, the places you’re going, the things you’re doing, and it motivates you to work even harder .” Unknown I had been working with Andrea Arlotti on my nervous system for about nine months by the spring of 2023, and during one session, she asked what was behind a particular hard spot in the lower right side of my abdomen. As soon as she asked, tears immediately began flowing. Not from a thought, it was a feeling. There was no welling up of tears in my eyes, it was like a faucet had been turned on and the flow was instant. I cannot remember tears ever immediately spilling out of my eyes so quickly that I couldn’t even try to slow them. No thought, just a feeling deep inside my body…of pain. She asked who was there. I said I was. She asked how old I was and with no time for thought, I immediately, without even the slightest hesitation, said 3. And then I had a thought, “How did I know to say 3? Is that even possible?” She told me, “It’s OK you’re safe now . Y ou can take her hand and let her know she’s OK. ” I didn’t remember anything else, but it felt so intensely real that I knew something bad had happened to me like I felt after the dream about the barn, the dead chickens and all the blood. I wasn’t upset when I left, more just stunned at the experience of my body telling me something, being able to feel it and remember I was 3. Having words come out of my mouth without thinking of the answer first, considering if it was correct and how it would sound, it was just such an odd feeling. The tears and the words came out without me thinking, and that just wasn’t something that happened to me…ever . I had made vast improvements, but this was entirely different. Those things happened without any thought at all. My brain didn’t have a chance to stop the tears or the words from leaving my body. This quote really hit me when I read it. I would add to it: even when you didn ’ t know there’s an untold story inside you. Known or unknown, the agony is still there, and it shows up through behaviors that damage relationships. This is why talking about everything is so imperative. Where there are no secrets, there need be no shame. When I was on the MOCSA Johnson County Advisory Board and wanted to learn all about all of the services offered , I took a tour of the Kansas City facility. When we were taken into the children’s art therapy room, it was extremely difficult for me to be there. Of course, I didn’t allow any visible emotion while I was in the facility, but when I left, I was very upset and cried in my car until I forced myself to stop thinking about it. I figured it was so upsetting because I couldn’t understand how anyone could hurt a child like that. Looking back, though, when I was in that room, it wasn’t my brain telling me things that upset me, it was intense discomfort “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” Maya Angelou

369