Brave Enough To Be Bliss

“You have to choose to live in truth, however painful and ugly it might be. Choosing reality is where all healing and change begins.” John Delony

I’m not sure if this is the perfect chapter for this or not, but I can’t finish this book without including it. It is one of the most beautiful articles I have ever read. It speaks to me and breaks me down all at the same time. It makes me remember the night I was sitting on John’s sofa with him and we were having a great talk. My legs were up on the couch and he picked them up and put them on his lap, gently running his hands over them in a relaxing motion that melted my heart. It was simple, and yet exquisite, affection. It was those moments that allowed me to let go of his neck that night and experience both trust and freedom. In moments like that and when I allowed him to put my socks on for me, I wasn’t afraid at all to be loved. I didn’t pull away, in fact, I leaned in. I let go of fear and control and allowed him to reach right into the heart and soul of me. I was soaking it up and in, and it felt oh…so…good.

Love Is a Roof for All Our Brokenness - Propel Women

Following is the text conversation I had with Ginger when it became crystal clear that Nathan and I could only be friends.

“When you learn the lesson, the lesson will stop appearing.” Unknown

Ginger Bliss: Just in case you’re worried about my choices at all, Nathan and I had a good talk this morning. I told him we could only be friends. I’m truly laughing at myself in a good way. I think it was a God wink or God hitting me with a 2x4 more likely. I th ink he’s going ‍♀️ ‍♀️ ‍♀️ ‍♀️ ‍♀️ ‍♀️ ‍♀️ ‍♀️ , that lady is the most hardheaded one I’ve created!! But by golly, Jesus, and Holy Spirit, I think it’s a miracle and she’s finally GOT IT!!! Ginger R: Wonderful! I think the message from God was heard and now you can heal the trigger of being controlled. YOU are in control, no one else can control you now. You’ve got this! So, you don’t have to be afraid of someone overtaking you, changin g tone and hurting you, or violating you - YOU can protect you! YOU can trust you! You are everything you need to be safe in the world. Ginger R: This is the key to being brave enough to be bliss - trusting that you can protect yourself. When you have self-trust you don’t have fear because you know you can handle anything that comes up. Then your reactive fear brain settles down. Your brai n begins to trust that you can keep yourself safe, so it doesn’t have to sound the alarms and bite. It can now pause to see if the person is really coming as a true threat, or that person loves me and is trying to help. Then your brain will allow the help and love to come in closer. Ginger Bliss: It’s like it just takes sooooo long for anything to feel real to me. So many lessons and examples for me to really get it into the core of my being and feel it and be able to control my brain. And the plan, the visualization is so helpful. I have to learn it then put it in action and some of those tools can’t get tested as quickly as would be helpful. But I’m truly giggling at myself. I’m not ashamed and truly believe it’s all forgiven which is the first time I’v e felt that way. I just see myself with compassion as someone who was trying to figure everything out the best I could at the time and there’s so many decades to undo thinking and behavin g from. So, 5-6 years, not too bad. Ginger R: This last paragraph needs to be in your book! It takes me many repeated pain points for me to get the message too. And in my experience, when I get to the seeing it with humor that it happened yet again stage (where you are right now) then the lesson is c omplete. That’s how I know I have really learned it. That lesson file is closed, and it stops repeating. Also, I feel like Nathan came into your life to help you heal this and also show you Michigan, so you found a place to work on the book. But the real g ift of a guy is someone you haven’t met yet but will be the one who will take care of you, adore you, make you feel safe, cherish everything about you, and truly love you. Nathan was brought into your life for the purpose of healing, and helping you get to a place where you are ready for the gift God has for you. Ginger Bliss: Thank you for reminding me you had to learn too and you’re not perfect even if you are an expert and further along than me! That’s inspirational and aspirational! That’s what makes you so effective. And I’m relieved because that’s how it tr uly feels, but if doubt starts to creep in at some point, this gives me more confidence I really can count on it! It’s the first time I’ve f elt this way when it comes to a man. I see it so clearly. I believe I can protect myself; I can say no and no more, and I think I even believe, dare I say, I can love myself and accept God’s love. I know now I can let any man go and now I’ve done it several ti mes and honestly it doesn’t even hurt. I had just been listening to the voices and if I choose that, it’s self -inflicted and now I am in control of me. I refuse to listen to that bullshit anymore. I can see it all now. The power was always mine; no one took it or had it Ginger Bliss: Thank you for saying all that! I’ll keep it with the white board photo to refer to and clearly remind myself! ❤️

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