Brave Enough To Be Bliss

If you’re up for it, read this short exercise and follow the instructions. Then after you’re done, you can read about how the exercise went for me.

Consider Who You Admire — Ginger Rothhaas

I was heading back to Kansas City for Mother’s Day weekend and was scheduled to meet with Ginger at noon, so I had set my alarm for 7:30 a.m. I had gone to bed about 1:30 a.m. to get enough sleep to safely stay awake on the drive there. I had wanted to get as much as I could done with the book so I could take Mother’s Day weekend off and fully enjoy it with Kylee. I woke up abruptly at 6:30 a.m. feeling I needed to get up and go as soon as possible. It was just like when I woke up and felt that way the day I left for the second trip to Michigan. As I laid there in bed, I thought I could fall back asleep, but this time the feeling was even stronger and I even felt like the sheets were blowing on me to wake me up. And with that I got up quickly. As I was getting ready, though, I wondered why I needed to go, and I started conjuring up lots of ideas in my mind. I had noticed the door to one of the bedrooms was closing on its own and the front door had a gap in it I hadn’t noticed before. Was the whole building going to collapse ? Or was someone going to break into the condo? Was there going to be a huge accident on the way to Kansas City and I would be in it if I didn’t head out now? Yes, this is the crazy way my brain works. In the midst of all this, I felt this question arise: “Why do you always immediately think it’s something bad? What if it’s something good?” And I started laughing at myself…but I still got out of there as fast as I could, just in case. I had decided since I woke up right at 6:30 a.m., exactly one hour earlier than my alarm, I needed to be out of there by 7:30 a.m. I checked my phone at 7 a.m. and 7:15 a.m., and then in the hustle to get out hadn’t checked it again. I had made one trip down earlier, but I surprised myself and was able to get everything else down in one trip. As I closed the door and turned on the car, the alarm on my phone sounded. It was exactly 7:30 a.m., I was relieved and headed out. Of course, I wondered if I was just being silly, crazy, ridiculous…but by now, I didn’t really care . I t’s just better to listen to these feelings and I figured it wouldn’t hurt anything to be on my way an hour earlier than planned. Everything seemed uneventful and I had just taken the exit headed toward Bolivar. I was listening to music and singing along as usual. And then the following song came on and tears filled my eyes as I sang each word.

Lauren Daigle - Rescue (Official Lyric Video) (youtube.com)

I had always loved the song, but when I heard the words this time it tied some things together that I had been questioning for some time.

The night before I had written down the things I wanted to go over with Ginger at our appointment, so I didn’t forget anything. When I was in Michigan writing, I found an exercise that I had done as a result of one of her Tuesday emails in January 2020. Back at that time, I had emailed her the results so we could talk about it, but likely something more important arose back at that time and we didn’t discuss it. When I found it, I emailed her, but of course with everything that arose in Michigan that’s what took priority at that time. While I was at Table Rock I intended to bring it up on a couple of our calls, but never got to it. January 2020 I did this the way you said to in the email...wrote down my thoughts before I finished reading. Interesting because I don't really think of any of these people, except you, as having similar characteristics to me overall. I think of the rest of them as opposites where you I related to immediately because you made me feel safe by being softer, gentler, your kindness and compassion came through right away. Anyway, just thought I'd share for fun...

1. You: Compassionate, Kind, Caring, Smart, Honest 2. Female Friend: Honest, Caring, Fun, Funny, Loud, Faith 3. Male Friend: Perseverance, Fun, Real, Caring, Skilled/Intelligent 4. Female Friend: Endless Energy, Always Thinking/Planning/Improving, Caring, Faith 5. Male Friend: Successful, Strong, Caring, Making a Difference

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