Brave Enough To Be Bliss

like I thought about these things that literally, I was just living from that assumption. That’s the baseline my brain operated from.

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy – the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.” Brené Brown This book is your invitation to own your story, to bring it into the light, to share it with someone you trust and dig in to learn how it has affected your beliefs, relationships, parenting, level of self-compassion and the level of compassion you are able to show others. The ideas I share are not necessarily right or wrong, they are just mine. Many do not come from my brain, but rather emanate from my heart and soul, reflecting the experiences of my first 55 years on this earth. I made plenty of mistakes living in darkness and fear for most of those years, but more recently I’ve made confident strides toward living in the light. So much research has been done, so many experts exist. There are books, audiobooks, articles, podcasts, blogs, research studies, music, meditation, sermons, social media and so much more. I sought out all these resources and it was the work I did outside of my appointments with my self-compassion coach that helped the time I spent with her to be so much more productive. Like most things, the more we invest in something, the more we will get out of it. I realize there are people who cannot afford mental health services, are too scared to start right now, or for a host of other reasons have not yet been able to help themselves. So, for those people brave enough to read this book, I want to provide resources that may just touch their hearts enough to start learning on their own. Then one day, perhaps that will lead them to share their story with a trusted friend or seek the assistance of a professional. With every resource, quote or song I share, you can know it was one that has helped me continue on my own journey. So often, just the right quote, article, song or podcast would appear when I needed to be educated about something or simply be reminded, I was not alone. “You can rise up from anything. You can completely recreate yourself. Nothing is permanent. You’re not stuck. You have choices. You can think new thoughts. You can learn something new. You can create new habits. All that matters is that you decide today an d never look back.” Idil Ahmed But even with these endlessly available resources, until I was willing to confront my past, take responsibility for my present and learn all I could about myself, these resources and the tools they taught didn’t make the desired lasting impact. It’s a natu ral tendency for humans to avoid pain, want quick fixes and blame others for their problems, but I found the most genuine and enduring solution was and always had been within me. I really, really didn’t like that part. There were too many things within me that were hard and painful, and that I had been avoiding my whole life. As much as I wanted to disbelieve the experts when it was something I feared, didn’t want to face, or thought I was some sort of exception to, there truly was nothing and no one outside of myself who could ever make me feel fully loved, whole and purposeful enough if I did not feel that way about myself. And the time I spent fruitlessly searching for an external source to give me the answer was generally wasted time, and often led to even more pain. Searching anywhere but within did not ultimately bring me what I was seeking. It sucked, as you will learn in the following pages, and I fought it for years. Knowingly and unknowingly, life and people did terrible things to me, and it was up to me to reverse the damage. It’s not fair, it’s just life. And I’m being honest here, and life…is…hard. But my friends, I’ve learned that even the most imperfect life can also be oh…so…good. “I didn’t have the time, but I made the time. I didn’t have the knowledge, but I was relentless. I didn’t have the resources, but I was resourceful. I didn’t have the support, but I learned to lean on myself.” Luke Chlebowicz

But first it takes a decision to be brave.

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