Brave Enough To Be Bliss

no reason she should have to remember that I don’t like to look, so I’ve gotten used to it and just take a quick peek and tell her thank you. (Angie, please consider it exposure therapy and keep handing me the mirror.)

“In any given moment we have two options: To step forward into growth or to step back into safety.” Abraham Maslow

Following our communication while I was in Michigan, I don’t recall talking with Allen again until April 10, 2024, when he let me know, he took the brave step resigning from the job where he was so unhappy. I was thrilled to hear from him because he sounded like the man I had met several years earlier. It was like he had woken up or come alive again.

Following are a few of the text messages from Allen I want to share because I think the relief, excitement and self-reflection comes through so clearly in his communication.

“ I've dealt with depression before and it was the scariest time of my life, this was reminiscent of those thoughts and feelings. The numbness and lack of care for others. And if I'm going to stress myself to death, I'd rather do it close to home at least. There was panic in the executive team and it's prevalent which is not good from their standpoint. They started to really micromanage everything. Leaders are people you want to follow, people who are in the trenches with you, not people throwing the shovels at you to dig the trenches. ”

“ I think it's going to be good and while I'm at this new job, I'll be working on getting my business back up. I don't have any money in it or built up so I need to get a good plan together and then see if I can make it grow! ”

“ Thank you! It was a huge leap. The type that you know God's got you, but this is crazy. I didn't have anything in place when I turned my resignation letter in. But the weight that was lifted was the relief of self-doubt, unrealistic expectations, and then walking out that door the last time the air tasted better, the warmth of the sun hugged me tighter. I'm using this week to break the habits I created from that job .” “ You're exactly right! I haven't felt like this in so long and it snuck up on me. I knew there was something different but since it gradually consumed me, I didn't know how to stop it. There's joy again. The biggest thing that has been on my mind lately was from my devotion and it was a simple phrase, "Proximity creates perspective." I took two of my kids to the park while the oldest was at baseball practice. The youngest was swinging so high... by himself! And it hit me that I had been too busy with work that I was not the one who taught him to swing, and it hurt my heart. I can't make an impact if I'm not around. ”

I sent him a text the night before he started his new job saying, “Hope you had a terrific week and weekend. Best wishes in the new job! Very proud of you!”

And he responded in the morning, “ Thank you! Hope you had a great weekend as well! Time to start the new journey! ”

I experienced pure joy reading that short message because he was excited again about life. Life can feel empty and meaningless when there is no excitement, no joy, no hope. Knowing he had been there and now hearing about the brighter days ahead, made me feel privileged to have witnessed a bit of the transformation. When I sent him this chapter to review since I couldn’t remember the details about his night in jail, he also sent back his thoughts: “ That was a great read! The things that I thought about while reading it lean back on your title, Suffering Alone. As a man, we tend to just handle the issues. Whether we know how to or not. We'll find a way to figure it out or just avoid it and push through thinking that's what we have to do. Why is it men consist of 2/3 of suicides? We know we aren't Clark Kent, Superman. But we will put on our cape every day to protect our family and those around us. But we don't always just suffer alone, we fight alone, we battle alone. This way when we fail it's alone, when we stumble, it's alone. But then when we succeed, it's alone too. Why is it the majority love language of men is touch? Because we're tired of being alone, but we compartmentalize it thinking we're dealing with it. That longing to just be hugged by your significant other without asking or getting a back rub right when you come home because of the hard work that you did. With this new job, I'm home in the mornings when the kids wake up and not just waking them up as I was leaving out the door. Each one of them, every morning, will walk into the kitchen while I'm eating breakfast and doing my devotion and hug me. I get to have those first few minutes of their waking day holding them in my arms. Showing them the

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