Brave Enough To Be Bliss

work with me, etc. I could make up all kinds of great things in my mind at that time! So, thank you for your kind response as the whole process is yet another example to me of how far I've come, how much better it feels to be honest instead of scared, how it can be done in a way that isn't rude, how thinking I can know how someone else will receive anything is dangerous, etc. And how a good message can be made even better with input! Appreciate you very much!

On Oct 24, 2022 at 2:10 PM Becky wrote: Ginger, ABSOLUTELY POWERFUL! Now, go write about it!

“I will never regret getting old. I know too many people who never had that privilege.” Unknown

Remember Brené Brown’s halfway to dead video I shared a link for in Section III, Chapter 7? I sent that video to a friend who was explaining to me that she couldn’t try EMDR again. She said it was just too hard and painful and questioned why she needed to remember anyway. She was just so frustrated and ready to quit and accept her halfway to dead living. She watched the video, and this screenshot is our text exchange. This is the power of sharing our fears, thoughts, feelings, knowledge and growth. Through vulnerably sharing the real stuff of life, we not only help ourselves, but we can also help one another and always be reminded, we are not alone. This friend’s dad had issues he didn’t deal with, and as a result, he wasn ’ t the best father he could have been. Fortunately, there was some healing between them before his death, but I have a feeling there are still unaddressed issues within her that she will face when she’s ready . About a year after those texts, I sent her an old photo of her dad holding Kylee when she was a baby. She responded that she misses him and was grateful to see the photo. I responded to her with this message. I bet you do miss him. He always loved you way more than he had the ability to show you through his actions, behavior and likely verbalization. He could be better for your kids because he had learned some stuff by then, but when he looked at them, he saw you. When he was holding the baby in this photo, he was looking into your eyes in his mind. And with your kids, he had the chance to do better for you, even if he wouldn’t have been able to articulate it exactly like that, but that’s what happens with so many parents.

That’s just what we hurt humans do, we pass along the pain without even being aware of what we are doing. I did it. I am no different than your dad, other than choosing different ways to hurt myself and others. But I was no better than him. I have just done better since then by choosing to do whatever it takes to heal and continue to learn and grow throughout my lifetime. Healing oneself is the most sacrificial way to love others. ❤️ By choosing to walk straight into one ’ s own pain and do the very hard work to heal from it, that is a sacrifice similar to stepping in front of whomever you love and taking a bullet for them. Many people would prefer to take a bullet than disclose and deal with their pain, i.e. suicide. Choosing to heal from whatever has hurt a person is emotionally laying down one ’ s life for family, friends, all who one encounters in this world. So many people live a halfway life…just in varying ways. Emotionally doing something halfway, whatever it is (like living halfway to dead, loving someone halfway instead of giving our whole hearts thinking it’ll protect us, forgiving halfway, withholding thoughts or feelings and refusing to verbally expressing them to avoid conflict, etc.), hurts us and those we love because we choose to stay stuck in pain from the past and therefore we choose, even if unknowingly, to pass along pain to those we love. The choice to love God, ourselves, and others all the way is what can bring indescribable joy and peace and make this hard life fully worth living. I love you, dear friend!

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