PEORIA MAGAZINE August 2023

Kim Scardina, LCPC, a therapist at Peoria’s Carle Health

said Merna. “Everything we do is age appropriate and evidence-based.” Social media is currently part of the Center’s anti-bullying message, which begins with a definition. “That’s where the conversation starts,” said Merna. “Then it can go much further, when it’s age-appropriate, to include kids sharing nudes with each other and helping students understand those pictures live forever when they’re online. ‘IF YOU WOULDN’T DO SOMETHING IN PERSON, DON’T DO IT ONLINE’ — Carol Merna “Many people think it’s that panel van that’s going to come up and snatch their child,” which is a rare occurrence, when it’s “much easier to do something anonymously, to make up an identity, approach somebody online and then dupe them into doing something,” said Merna. Her recommendation to parents is “keep talking to your kids. Talk about inappropriate conduct. Talk about inappropriate contact and talk

about your values. If you wouldn’t do something in person, don’t do it online. Don’t give out your personal information. Enjoy the entertainment factors. Enjoy the tools we’ve been given for learning, but guard yourself and be safe.” Another issue is human trafficking. “It’s in every corner of the country and it’s across the globe. Peoria is no different, and it does happen here,” said Merna, adding that social media often is where it starts. WHAT’S A PARENT TO DO? “The advice I would give to parents is to start off your child’s social media use with restrictions,” said Scardina. “Too often parents start it off with ‘we trust our child and they’ve grown up with tech nology.’ But then when you have to take something away, it becomes a battle.” Scardina recommends that strict boundaries be the default position. “They have to earn your trust with it,” she said. “Talk about … the amount of time on the phone, the parents keeping the phone until homework is done, parents having the phone’s password or the phone not having a password, so the parents can search it at any time.”

She suggests parents use monitoring apps that limit what their child can search for online and that only the adults can download. Merna also is a strong advocate for monitoring youth social media use, and for parents being parents. “Hopefully, kids are being talked to early and often, and … there’s been an honest and open environment created,” she said. “When you talk about your values, kids know what the family considers to be right and what’s wrong. That’s going to last all the way up until they have kids of their own.” “We have to understand that social media is here. It is not going anywhere and part of what we’re going to have to do is adjust to the environment where social media is part of the conversa tion,” said Scott. “So, what do we do about navigating it versus trying to eliminate it?”

Linda Smith Brown is a 37-year veteran of the newspaper industry, retiring as publisher of Times Newspapers in the Peoria area

60 JULY 2023 PEORIA MAGAZINE