Massage Therapy Journal Summer 2026

20 • Massage Therapy Journal

Most people think of big, tragic events like the loss of a loved one or a chronic or terminal diagnosis, a wanted pregnancy cut short by miscarriage, or a friend or loved one navigating infertility. They think of something that is often beyond the person’s control, or at least not completely within their control, that is often also long-term, life changing and almost always devastating. Many people who encounter someone grieving have an almost automatic sympathy for and empathy with them. Of course, there are many other life events that can cause grief, too, like divorce, retirement, financial difficulties and family estrangement, all examples that a person might actually choose or need but still bring feelings of immense sadness and loss. No matter the source, all grief has one thing in common, at least in the U.S.: A culture that doesn’t promote a healthy grieving process. We don’t talk about grief because it’s uncomfortable, and many of us stay stuck in the grief process because we don’t know how to “fix” it. As a massage therapist, you may be feeling apprehensive or even fearful if a client gets emotional during a session. You may be afraid to say the wrong thing or worry you’ll make your client feel worse. Of course, you also have ethical boundaries you’re constantly reinforcing so want to ensure you’re not providing a grieving client any therapy that bleeds outside your scope of practice. W hat is the first thing you think of when you hear that someone is grieving? Grief is not a one-size-fits-all experience and will show up in people differently because everyone will process grief in a unique way.

Understanding grief for yourself, however, will help you feel more confident and capable of helping your clients understand what massage therapy can offer and the profound difference massage can have in easing emotional pain, as well as when you’ll need to refer out to another health care provider. We already know that grief hurts, but physical pain is also part of the healing process and one area where massage therapy can really shine. So, let’s break it down and talk about it. What is Grief? According to the American Psychological Association’s (APA) Dictionary of Psychology: “Grief is the anguish experienced after significant loss, usually the death of a beloved person. Grief often includes physiological distress, separation anxiety, confusion, yearning, obsessive dwelling on the past and apprehension about the future. Intense grief can become life-threatening through disruption of the immune system, self-neglect and suicidal thoughts. Grief may also take the form of regret for something lost, remorse for something done or sorrow for a mishap to oneself.” Even more simply, The Cleveland Clinic suggests grief can “accompany any event that disrupts or challenges our sense of normalcy or ourselves.” Everyone will experience grief differently. We must remember that although we can lean into broad definitions and the outdated and often inaccurate “stages of grief,” grief is not a one-size-fits-all experience and will show up in people differently because everyone will process grief in a unique way. The Physiology of Grief Notice the APA definition of grief above mentions “physiological distress,” “anxiety” and “disruption of the immune system,” which begs the question: What does grief do to our body exactly? Experiencing grief is one of the most intense stress responses our bodies can endure, and not

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